Tag Archives: Michigan Tech

March 10, 2013 · 9:55 am

Full House Week

Friday all the kids returned to the nest for Spring Break. I’m pretty sure Divine Providence aligned Auburn and Michigan Tech’s academic calendars this year to enable all the kids to be home at once. And as much as I do appreciate having them home, it’s not lost on me that I have to cook for 5 again, have to endure the television being on at all hours again (I don’t like to turn the thing on unless there’s something specific that I’m going to watch. I like the quiet), and enjoy bantering and what not.

I know, I’m never happy.

I think the Universe collaborated on this because I’m pretty sure this is the last time we’ll have a break like this with all the kids home. The oldest kid is getting ready to head off to Grad School, at best will be several thousand miles away from Minnesota, read “not coming home except for big holidays” and at worst might be in foreign countries, read “not coming home for anything”. I think these family reunions are close to taking on the look and feel of a real reunion, meaning once or twice a decade and or when someone dies. And since I’m probably first on that list I won’t even get to enjoy the time.

Because nothing good ever comes without a price, there is a downside to having Auburn and Michigan Tech aligning their academic calendars- graduation. Both sons have finals the same week and for the young man at Auburn that includes a final on Friday. Which means we have a clusterfuck of a logistics problem trying to figure out how to get him packed up and out of the dorm in Alabama on Friday afternoon, and into a seat for Pomp and Circumstance in Houghton Michigan 18 hours later.

Houghton BTW, one of the most remote places in the contiguous 48 states. No one gets there easily.

Actually it’s not the lad that we’re all that worried about, its how we parents are going to be able to do this. One of us will have to go down to Alabama and facilitate the evacuation from Lupton Hall. The other one of us will have to pick p Grandma at the airport in MPLS and get her to Houghton, a 7 hour drive.

At this point I have no idea how all of this is going to come together, I keep thinking about the fable with the wolf, the sheep and the sack of grain and how many trips the farmer will have to make across the river to get everyone over safely before the scorpion stings him in the back and they both drown because it’s what scorpions do… It is a situation that is that confusing.

And when my wife needs me to think clearly and come up with a solution for something like that I like to retreat into my basement hidy hole and eat tater tots and watch MASH reruns until the feelings of confusion go away or I fall asleep and nap for a few hours. Problem is there is a kid living in the basement this week so I’m stymied once again my this “full house” thing.

And.. for the 1,395th time there is water in the basement.

Mrs S and I were off at the Chanhassen Dinner Theaters for a little Lodge event yesterday afternoon. More on that even later, suffice to say while I enjoy the shows, I don’t like spending 5 hours on a Saturday in one place and the food sucks. I digress.

Water problem in the basement.. There are 11 identified conditions which can cause water to appear in our basement. Among them:

  • Drain pipes not glued together- shitty contractor there, but was fixed in 2010. We think. 
  • High humidity- we’ve had enough condensation down there to create pretty good sized puddles that soak the carpet. Dehumidifier in stalled in 2009, re-installed (backward condenser) in 2011. Seems ok for now.
  • Power outages- In the spring or when it rains the sump pump down there runs about every 20 minutes. If the power goes out… Installed a battery system in 2011. Installed moisture alarm in 2012.
  • Tampon Tidal Wave- flush enough high absorbency items down the stool; hygiene products,  entire rolls of toilet paper, old mop heads, kittens etc… and the main sewer line clogs which causes the downstairs toilet to explode which causes us to have to bring in Service Master which causes me to have to look up words like “coliform”.. Solution- remove all trees and shrubs between the house and the city sewer line and get the line rotorooted every year. If nothing else works please G-d let this one never happen again.
  • Fast Snow Melt, frozen drain pipe. BINGO.

 OK no one gives a shit about my basement issues, price I pay for living in a hole. This time around it was the fast snow melt. Good news is, both boys were home, saw what was happening and fixed the problem on their own, bailing out a flooded window well AND bypassing a frozen drain pipe thereby limting the water in the basement to the cement floor in the mechanical room.  

And in that one instance making 22 and 18 years of care and feeding all worth it. I can now recommend having sons, which up until then I was on the fence about, about children in general actually. Actually the best part of this whole affair was coming home and watching the boys having a great time together solving this problem. Kidna cool, Mrs S did a great job parenting these kids.

But Sank, you have a daughter.. jury is still out on that, she’s a teenager at the moment and wouldn’t be fair to judge.

Yet.

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August 19, 2012 · 11:29 am

Blake Lake Report- Aug 19

BlakeLake

Where the hell did summer go? I know I’m old and that’s clique but this one really got away from me.

And while I’m at, “Get off my fucking lawn” and “200 feet the shore is NO WAKE asswipe”.

Got those of my old fat guy chest.

Made it back up after a three week hiatus. Last time I was up there was for a “guys” weekend.

Mrs S had a few observations. “Thought you said you cleaned the place” was how the conversation started. I’ve been married long enough and seen enough Law & Order to know the difference between a legitimate question and a trap set by a DA. I answer with very confident “huh”?

Best to keep the options open when being interrogated by the opposite sex. I don’t always know where the conversation is going, if you know what I mean.

But the circumstantial evidence was stacked against me.

- Bedroom window left wide open.

- Coffee in the coffee maker, with an interesting fuzzy white top.

- Beer can left on the soap shelf in the shower. I don’t anything about that except to say… never mind I have no answer.

- Night vision goggles on the table. Not so much messy thing but she was wondering A) Where they came from and B) what do 5 guys in their mid to late 40’s do with night vision goggles.

- 5 empty CO2 cartridges on the deck and an empty can of pellets.

- A receipt from the local store for bottles of Jim Beam and Tanqueray. A second receipt from the same store, three hours later for another bottle of Tanqueray, a pack of Marlboroughs, a pack of Winston’s, 5 Hershey bars and tub of wax worms. When I run into the guys who were here we’re gonna have to have a little conversation about receipts and evidence. Amateurs.

“Was not me, we had a few smokers over and there’s still some Tangueray, how’bout I fix you a G&T my precious luv dove.” “Shez Sank, only missing was midget wrestling and a newly dug grave”. Obviously she didn’t get over behind the garage.

This is why I could never commit a crime, I don’t know how to destroy evidence so well.

So that’s how the weekend started, yours truly in the dock getting prosecuted. And when I get prosecuted by my spouse I’ll freely admit that always more about damage control and containment as I am, in almost all cases guilty of something. This was no exception.

Moving on.

This was the last weekend that the oldest would be at the lake until next summer, unless we make a winter trip. And the possibility of that isn’t very good as he’s not home all that long in the winter, so this was it. He didn’t make it up there very much this summer either due to the field work he was doing on the Upper Peninsula for school. Field work mapping places that have been mapped by thousands of geo students before them and an added surprise project as all available geology, engineering students and professors still in town over the summer were summoned to help out when a bulldozer fell into giant sinkhole while digging out the foundation for the new Mineral Museum.

Michigan Tech is a building a new facility to house the Michigan State Mineralogical Museum. Basically it’s the state rock collection. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a damned fine collection and should you find yourself in Houghton Michigan for some reason it’s definitely worth a stop. Of course Houghton Michigan is just about as remote a place as you get and still have running water and WIFI so I’m not sure any of you dear readers will get there, but should you, you should go.

I digress.

It seems that in the digging of the foundation the crew discovered a stope that that been lost to the world for last 100 years or so. Frankly you can’t hardly dig a hole around Keweenaw Peninsula and not hit a shaft or a stope. Apparently about half the foundation is over mine fill, tailings and abandoned equipment the other half empty stope.

Stoping is the removal of the wanted ore from an underground mine leaving behind an open space known as a stope.[1] Stoping is used when the country rock is sufficiently strong not to cave into the stope, although in most cases artificial support is also provided. As mining progresses the stope is often backfilled with tailings, or when needed for strength, a mixture of tailings and cement.

Personal note you learn more reading this blog, you can all thank me for a new vocabulary word, you’re quite welcome.

The stope and the tunnels to access it that had to be found and plotted and all that sort of thing. And a plan had to be developed to figure out what to do about it to make the foundation for the new building stable and on and on. The lad got so spend a day or two surveying and interpreting ground penetrating radar, while other kids poured over historical mine surveys and plans to try to figure out what they had and where it went. Turns out it was part a system of tunnels that were used to transport ore from the mine down to the shore of Potage Lake where stamp mills once pulverized the ore to extract copper or whatever it was the were looking for. Today there’s a neighborhood down on the lake built on the acres and acres of lake that was filled in by the fine sand that was the result of this operation.

Or so I’m told.

Lookit that, more general knowledge for you people, my gift to you!

Lost in my own mind again.

Sum up- kid hasn’t been up here much this summer. Twice actually. Now that he’s 21 it would have been really hand to have him up here. Certain errands can only be asked of persons 21 and older and since asking Mrs S to make a run to the booze outlet at 11:15 am, well at almost any time, rarely works out the way I’d like it too, it’s nice to have a kid to do it.

We spend some time on the water, the two of us, fishing away the last weekend before he departed for British Columbia for a few months. Fishing was slow, but in some ways I enjoy it. I like the problem solving of trying to figure out what the bass are doing and what techniques will work to catch them. Took an hour or so, but we found fish, they were deep and in a negative mood which means they were not really biting. So slower presentations, patience and getting in the right place meant we were able to land a dozen or so decent fish over the two days. But you sure had to work for them.

P1000254And the work did pay off, I got a 23” bass that came in at just over 7lbs, shattering my personal Blake Lake and lifetime records. That was pretty exciting.

State Fair starts on Thursday this week, which means the traditional summer time vacation stuff is coming to fast end. Sad. Every time the State Fair gets going I’m a struck with a little melancholy as I realize that we got a lot less 80 degree days left in the year than we do 20 degree days.

But I like 20 too, in its season. And that’s certainly coming.

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March 11, 2012 · 10:19 am

A Storm’s A Brewing

For those of us who are big fans of St. Paul there is real reason to be worried, we just might be enjoying the last week of sanity in our lovely Capital City.

March is Tournament Month here in Minnesota. The winter sports have their championships, the big one here in the Northland is the Boys Hockey tournament. Last night the period was dotted bittersweet sports story of the year, as the Benilde-St. Margaret Red Knights  defeated the Hill-Murray Pioneers 5-0 to win the Class AA boys hockey championship. For those you not from around here this years season at Benilde will be remembered for a long time, not just because championship, but because of the injury suffered December 30, 2011 by Jack Jablonski a sophomore skater who was checked from behind into the boards resulting in a severed spinal cord at the neck and two fractured vertebrae.

This season was dedicated to Jack, who watched the game with his family from a box at the Excel. Bittersweet to say the least.

But that’s not what I’m worried about for St. Paul next weekend.

This weekend the Western Collegiate Hockey Association (WCHA) will be having their Final Five Conference Tournament at the Excel Energy Center in St. Paul. 6 teams from the conference will be here, along with their fans enjoying 5 hockey games in 3 days. I used to have season tickets to this event, this year I let them lapse. Dumb move on my part because this year oldest kids school Michigan Tech will be here in St. Paul playing in the tournament.

On a sad note this is the last year that this tournament is going to matter or frankly be worth attending. The big teams in the conference are all bailing and college hockey will never be the same, or in my opinion, as good. Seriously, why you screw up natural rivalries and break up college hockey’s premier conference is beyond me.

The Minnesota Golden Gophers are the Notre Dame of college hockey. Outstanding program with a long history of success, hated by everyone outside the Twin Cities. Their arch-rivals are the University of North Dakota Fighting [name to be determined but not printed here]. Minnesota Duluth a recent powerhouse is there, Wisconsin, Colorado College, Denver.. all great programs that are leaving. Minnesota and Wisconsin are leaving for a  new Big 10 Hockey conference where only 6 schools actually have hockey. And.. no one cares. North Dakota will join Duluth, the Colorado schools, Nebraska-Omaha in a new mid-west conference that only folks from Fargo and Grand Forks will care about.

This Big 10 thing screws up the CCHA as well as natural rivals Michigan, State, Northern and Western Michigan won’t play each other anymore.

I digress here.

So in St. Paul we have the championship game, which I’m thinking the Gophers will be in.. and when the Goph’s are playing on championship Saturday night the Excel is a 18,000 seat home rink that rocks down to it’s foundation. Their home rink on Campus only seats about 10,000 fans and has been sold out for years.

So that’s Saturday night.

Saturday afternoon at 1:00, in the same venue the NHL Minnesota Wild will be taking on the Carolina Hurricanes. So we’ll have a pile of college and pro hockey fans downtown at the same time. Looking at the calendar I see that all of this sports orgy goodness falls on Saturday, March 17. St. Patrick’s Day. No town in Minnesota does St. Patty’s like St. Paul. Former governor Jessie Ventura once was quoted as saying St. Paul streets were laid out by drunken Irishmen. Leaving aside the stereotype of drunks, St. Paul was a very Irish city back in the day.

So there you have it, three unrelated events coming together at the same time, in the same place; the Excel Energy Center in St. Paul.

I’m thinking smoldering ruins.

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October 24, 2011 · 9:36 pm

My Happy Place

I was thinking today about things that make me happy.
I’m not all that far away from being a full on curmudgeon. Here’s some of my happy thoughts to start my week:

1) My best buddy Giggs. This morning he dumped over the kitchen trash and dragged coffee grounds, banana peels and and a wrapper from a package of chicken thighs through the living room while I was in the shower. This made me feel anger in my heart. I told him he was a very very bad dog.
Last week he did the same thing with a load of bathroom garbage. Mrs S would have killed him on the spot if she walked in her bedroom and saw what I saw. Dumb dog.
While I was at work today he duced in his kennel filling the house with a the smell of a Corgis Colon. That really made me chuckle that little joker, the old poop in the house thing haaha. He’s pretty silly when he wants to be.

2) My kids college, Michigan Tech, called me this evening while I was eating dinner. I like running to the phone when I’m eating my organic greens and free range chicken. There was a really nice young lady on the phone who expressed all sorts of care about our family and our son at Michigan Tech. She chatted up about the weather and the fall semester, what our other kids were up too, Really nice gal.
Well, after chatting our little closer had another reason for her call, apparently the money our son we send him to pay tuition isn’t enough, she wants more. I’m sorry to say that I didn’t think she really cared about us at all in her heart of hearts. She wanted me to sign up to send Tech more money.
She did sound really nice so I asked her if she knew my son Nate. She didn’t. “You know dear” I said to her, “He’s actually kinda lonely up there, what if I gave you his address and you could pay him a little visit and maybe be his girlfriend. You sound kinda nice”. You know what, that little vixen has never even been to Tech, or Michigan for that matter. She sure fooled me the little trickster. I asked her if she’d ever done other ticks and she hung up on me.
What about that!

3) Speaking of tricks, while I was trying to Skype with my kid, let him know the good news that I may have found him a girlfriend, except I didn’t know where she lived, why, wouldn’t you know it but a very lonely lady from Nigeria started sending me IM’s. She said she had seen my profile and wanted to reach out to me and start a conversation. Isn’t that nice? I told Nate I’d call him back and chatted with Helen for a while. She’s from a poor family and she’s looking friendship and would like to get to know a loving man like me. *sniff sniff*

She asked if I was single. Mrs S is in California so uh.. yeah. kinda. She wanted to send me some pictures of herself and hoped that I could fly her to America so we could meet. I am so lucky. Seriously, here’s a woman who WANTS to meet me. Every other woman I know feels something different than want.

I told her that I had a ton of respect for the good people of Nigeria and their burgeoning internet fraud business. She was honored that I thought so. I asked her what a white Jewish woman was doing living in Nigeria, and she became confused. I only date Jewish women, my wife wouldn’t want me taking a second wife who wasn’t of our faith. I also asked if she had any sisters because they could be our wives as well. In the Bible King Solomon had thousands, I would like three of four.
Well, she must have had a phone call or something because I didn’t hear back from her again. I hope she IM’s back. Mrs S is going to SO Surprised.

4) PETA. They were protesting outside the Shrine Circus this weekend. My kid was working at the circus and engaged the PETA folks. They’re a funny bunch the PETA guys, they love animals. I love them too, but as pets and food. They love them for something else I think. Therapists and spouses. My kid was yelled at by a brilliant young lady who told him he was “making minimum wage while animals were suffering” he responded well “Minimum wage? I’m a volunteer” to which she called him a idiot and animal hater.

My son does hate some animals, mostly my best buddy Giggs. I made him clean up the little indiscretion Giggs left in the kennel this morning, Giggs likes to bite him when he’s reaching in his kennel picking up the dookie. Cuter’n hell.

Well sometimes I like to help my kids and I’m glad to report that I was especially helpful for Eric. “Next time they ask you what your doing tell them ‘I have to do this because this is the slow season at my Dad’s mink farm, we let the critters grow out their hair in the fall before we break their little necks and skin’m up”.
He did. I’m proud of him.
I hate PETA. Self serving dumbshits.

5) This morning I found a tweet on my phone from a shoe company, forwarded to me by Kare11 News. Apparently they’re trying out a new source of revenue, it’s call spam. They spam their followers on twitter with ads. I tweeted my disgust and some lady named CarrieAnnWD sent me a note that she likes spam and I should lighten up. She has a picture of cat for her Twitter profile. One of her tweets said she once stole cadaver cats from a science lab and gave them a proper funeral service. She’d like PETA, they get confused about the difference between cats and people too.
She wouldn’t like my wife’s grandfather, he never got confused about animals and people. He once told me, when we were at his farm; “Son, some critters ’round here have names, and some of don’t. If you’re a critter on my farm, you want a name.”

He never gave a cat a name, and there were more than a few cats on his farm. He used to shoot the cats with a .410 because they’d eat his game birds. “Gotta get them damned kitty’s he’d say” One time I went “kitty walk” with him. Feral cats sure run fast, I couldn’t hit one with a .410.
With a 12 gauge I had no problem, but there wasn’t much meat left.
Kidding, kidding, lighten up.
I would never eat a cat. They make better compost.
I think this cat thing runs in the family.
My father in law used to have a license plate thing that said “Cats flattened, no charge”. I asked him one time if that would be a problem, “if ever you ran over a kitty, and stopped and the owners and came out and saw that they might think you really meant it.” His reply “stopped? why would I stop.”
He always had the right answer, my Father in Law.

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August 25, 2011 · 9:57 pm

Offline and Off Center Let Downs

I’ve been offline for a few days. Lost time I guess. Oh, just to clarify, offline means the brain was disconnected and was not able to generate prose for this space of the quality that I like to provide.

I’m not going to write it off to “writers block”, that’s to easy, I’m going to suggest that I simply got derailed for a few days. Priorities at work, home et al have sort of taken up my attention. Doesn’t help that there just hasn’t been a lot going to write about.

You’d think there would be with the return of Mrs S from 3 weeks in California. The news from Cali continues to get better and better, a huge sigh of relief for the family and yet another example of the my father-in-laws fighting spirit and, in some ways, stubbornness.

If I had half of his get’r done approach I’d never miss a day on this site. Matter of fact I’d make my living writing in some capacity. But alas, I prefer to keep the bill collectors far away rather than take a risk at something as uh.. well as risky as actually trying make a go on my own talents in the creative space.

This week summer starts realize it’s own mortality as the weeks and weeks of happy go lucky carefree living are starting to come to a quick end.The kids are out getting fitted with their school bits, which by next week will have the reigns of academic achievement attached to them. In a couple weeks from now it’s goign to get really quiet around here.

This morning Mrs S accompanied our eldest back to the wilds of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula where on Monday he starts his junior year and at Michigan Technological University.  Even harder for me get my head around for some reason, middle kid starting his senior year in High School. Poor middle kid. I have to go out and take some pictures of him for his Senior Picture. We Sank’s are bad. When the eldest achieved seniorhood, a good friend of mine met us at the MPLS sculpture gardens and shot some stills of the lad. We picked one and sent it in for his picture.

We never printed another one. Listening to other parents talk about spending a couple G’s on photogs and outfits and settings and all that crap, I feel kinda bad that we didn’t spend a nickel. Or frankly, have any plans to spend more than a nickel on the middle kid. Matter of fact, since he’s the middle kid and we’ve been through this already, maybe we’ll just send off his eight grade picture, the last time he sat for a photo. Or send in his brothers picture and change the name.

Remember who you’re dealing with here, we are didn’t have a photographer capture any of the kids Bar/Bat Mitzvahs or anything else, and our only family portrait, only has two kids in it, because that’s all we had in 1995 when we had it taken.

Where was I going with this?

I have 5 months now to talk the kid out of a grad party and I’m doing my very best. With the oldest this wasn’t even an issue. He didn’t want one. This kid however, a bit more social than his older introverted brother. He might actually request one so the offer had better be a good one if I have any chance of turning his head. (BTW, daughter no f’n chance at all, she might even break the family streak and go to prom damn it)

Here it is- “If you agree to not having a social observance of your High School Graduation, I will take you to two Premier League games in the UK. (double end a weekend or do a Saturday/Sunday thing) If you agree to be nice, I’ll make sure we the Mighty Wolves. And, if you agree, NOT TO GO TO PROM, I’ll make it a week when the Champions League is playing in England and we can slip in one of those games on a Wednesday night.”

I would jump all over that. Seriously. It’s such a win win, he wins, I win (trip to England after all) who wouldn’t jump all over that, especially a big soccer head like he his.

Turns out, he isn’t exactly jumping on the bait. I can see the offer is causing serious dissidence in his head, he wants to say “yes” or “no”, can’t quite figure out which one but he wants to do one. Even when Mrs S go wind of the Prom bribe, for which I earned a serious rebuke (she really wants to stand outside the venue with all the other parents when the little couples go walking past, throwing confetti or what ever, an activity I can even imagine as being anything but completely and utterly LAME. Buy that’s just me) even when she pulled that bribe off the table and said no, he still couldn’t answer.

This will be a developing story I’m afraid.

 

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April 29, 2010 · 6:20 am

Houghton Michigan

I don’t know what it is about Houghton and Hancock that makes think I could live here. The scenery is unbelievable, the towns are small, but have everything an old fat guy needs, there’s some culture, some sports and outstanding outdoor activities. It’s very cool.

Seems like living here would be idyllic and stress free. Well so I freaking thought but I guess there are demons in everything, for example the dude that was behind me as I was  slowly driving through downtown gawking at the stores and sights. OK I was moving a little slow but I was on cobblestone streets and there are some pedestrians around.. So imagine my surprise when the rusted out ’82 Ford Pinto with the bearded fat ass and his mumu wearing fragrance free aged hippy wife pulled up behind me and started laying on the horn. Sheez dude whats the rush..

The guy whipped around me made a left turn merge into traffic with out looking, just about sideswiped another car, corrected by popping a tire onto the meridian and without looking back.. punched it and head off into the distance.Total Big CITY move.  WTF. these people are supposed to be mello.. remember that word? M E L L O. Must be a sale at the tie-die store or the hydroponic garden place.

I’m in Houghton this week to collect the oldest kid who has completed his first year of college. First year done? Already? And now he’s coming home? And it’s hardly May? I’m a little worried about how we’re going to be reintegrating him into the family to be honest. We’ve all sort of moved on and have a good thing going the four of us. Now we’re going to have to readjust and react to his return.

Could be a long summer. This is after all, the child who has a complaint about every nuance in his life, which gets wearisome after a while I have to tell you.

I made the trip this time with a friend of mine from the office. He’s a big fly fisherman and we’re planning to spend a couple days up here fishing and enjoying all that the U.P. has to offer. If, we can figure out where to go. We’ve sort of come up against an unexpected obstacle in our plans.. apparently no one here fly fishes. I mean nobody. The one shop that I found on the internet that was the “Headquarters” for outdoors adventures, and who BTW, on the phone told me that they were the place to be for information and advice.. well went there yesterday and guess what, not a clue.

“What flies are working now?” “Um.. I sell alot of these black ones..” That’s not a good sign. “any hatches going on right now?” blank stare… “Nymphing or dryflyes?”.. more blankness. “The streams look really low, where should we go?” Pulls out a map book and starts reading it.. um… well… this looks good here..”What’s good about it?” I think he noticed that it was a blue line and thus.. a trout stream.. “lot of people here use nightcrawlers”. We’re screwed.

We’re on our own. Went to the local book store and found a couple books. They should help, but with the water as low as it is up here.. we’re going to be scouting. A LOT. With, BTW, a car loaded up with student shit. Could have planned this better I guess.

The guy I’m with is actually one of the funniest human beings on the planet. On the way up remarked that “This was going to be great, couple single dudes on the prowl in a college town..”

WTF? Neither of us are single and uh.. we’re old. “Call your son and see if knows any chicks with a certain casual moral..” He was kidding of course.

“Call your son and see if there’s a Fawn Liebowitz at Tech.” The girl who, in Animal House was killed in the Kiln explosion, enabling the lads to get the sympathy dates. When I checked in I got the room, handed him the room card I got the comment “Can you get about 20 more of these.. sometimes you have to saturate the market to get a few hits”. OMG. Childish? You bet, but I’m laughing my ass of the whole way.

We will not be cruising cougars I assure you, but we will be joking about it now.

Today we check the kid out of his dorm, and leave Houghton for the summer heading west to Ontangan for the next couple days. Not sure on access in that town so posting may get spotty.

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August 23, 2009 · 7:42 pm

More College Observations-

image Mom lost it, as predicted. Happened at about 6:05 as we dropped him at his dorm for the final time, I said “bye”, she got out of the car and BOOM tears she’d been holding back on came’a flow’n. She got back in the car and we pulled away. Since we had some time to kill, a common occurrence in Houghton, she wanted to go a pep rally for parents and see the Dean of Students speak. As we got up to the even, her phone rang, it was the dude.. “ya got my sweatshirt?” yup we do. And we’ll bring it down and we’ll get to do this all over again. I did it alone. Not a worry, I have attachment disorder, according to my parents, so it wasn’t difficult.

At the kids day for siblings deal the University put on, my daughter made a care package for her brother with a note telling him to do well and that she loved him and to show she did, here’s some Top Ramen and some popcorn and a small bottle of hand sanitizer. She then proceeded to tell me that all the siblings were supposed to make their college siblings these little packages at one of the activities. When the kids got in the car, Lolo ratted Eric out in three seconds. “Eric did NOT make a care package because he said Nate hates him”. “no I didn’t” “Yes HE DID, HE SAID IT WAS POINTLESS BECAUSE NATE IS A JERK”. I believe her, Nate certainly can be a Jerk and I can see Eric not wanting to shit in a group of kids.

So we dumped the dude off and said goodbye again and dropped Mrs S off at her deal and we were free.

I left her at the rally thing and had some time with just the little kids to head over to the Lambda Chi Alpha House to check it out, in case he wanted to rush. I went to an orientation about Greek Life at Tech and learned all about how different it was from my years at school. Apparently the houses are dry now, they don’t haze and they live in a lasting environment of brotherhood and love. Walking into the house unannounced.. well lets just say I felt a bit like Dean Wormer in Animal House walking into the Delta House. Tomr

I introduced myself as a Lambda Chi Alum and looked around… the boys were casually stuffing glasses of beer under couches and behind chairs looking like deer in a spotlight. My comment was priceless.. “well, apparently the houses aren’t as dry as I was led to believe.” There were cups of beer everywhere, a couple full pitchers that indicated that somewhere in this house was a keg, and a narghilla in the corner that says “we have Turkish students here” or, we’re a bunch of beatniks. Nothing like an unknown old fat guy crawling into your house to scare the shit out of you. The house was an ancient old mansion that the lads were living in. It was exactly as I remember frat life. Squalor, miles of beer cans, cig butts, a kitchen that looked like a toxic waste dump and smelled exactly like I remember our kitchen smelling. It was nasty as can be. I hope he pledges.

Michigan Thing

Ok, does EVERYONE in this state hold up the their left hand, palm away, and then point to a spot on the back of their hand when you ask “where are you from?”  Everyone I met from the Lower Peninsula does that, or as they say up here;“under the bridge” a reference to the Mackinac Bridge that connects the Upper Peninsula to the Lower Peninsula. According to local postcards, only trolls live below bridges.

 

Tomorrow, the four of us get one last pasty and head home. It’s been a weekend no doubt about it.

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· 5:01 am

Notes from the end of the world

Houghton 019

There is a postcard you can buy here in Houghton that sort of says it all. It shows a road sign in the forest with the the following message:

End Of The World   4

Houghton                    6

That’s about it. Houghton 014

After we dropped the lad off at his room last night we found ourselves in Houghton Michigan, on a Saturday night, with nothing to do. How about a movie? Well, lucky me I got me one them fancy GPS things that tells you where the theatre is and as much as I detest going to movies, there wasn’t much to do as we’d  already seen the big mine in Hancock and all. (the town across the river) GPS has a FIND deal, ENTERTAINMENT, THEATRE.. the Lode is downtown we saw that one… cool old art deco house probably built in the 30’s. Lets the see, the next one is…. 89 miles away. Shit. Target? 123 miles away. Kmart? 89 miles away, probably next to the theatre. Liquor store? .1 miles, .2 miles, .4 miles, .4 miles, .8 miles… PAGE DOWN FOR MORE RESULTS.

At least there’s that.

Roommate.com

Last night we left the lad in his dorm room with his roommate “the Quiet One”. I’m not sure how they match kids up with roommates and dorm sections and all that sort’a stuff, but whom ever do the match.com algorithm my guess, started this way. When we were in the check in process I started to have the parental doubts about whether my kid was ready for school, ready to be on his own, ready to learn how to remember to pick up his mail.. things like that.

In all honesty my son is not the fastest socially on the block. He gets along, hangs with most kids, is smart enough to know who’s a dink and who isn’t and I get all that. But, he’s sort of loner (gee where’d that come from), kind of an introvert, has a few close friends but would rather hang out on his skateboard than go to prom. Which he did. As we were in there I kept seeing groups of kids who looked like they just walked out of the pages of GQ and who had that “we’re here to party and get laid” look that I can recognize a mile away thanks to the training I received when I was in school, some things never changing after all. These are kids I’m going to have to have a long talk with my daughter about one day in the hopefully not to near future.

But we were here and I fought the temptation to load everyone back in the car and just head home and built a moat around the house to keep out the world…

Last night, after a trip to Wal-Mart, the only store in town, for a few 12 packs of pop and snacks and either net cables and extension cords and what ever else the hell we needed I made it back to the dorm where I had a chance to see it populated with his neighbors and future friends.

Glad to report we’re going to be fine.

Walking through the dorms I’m happy to that Nate will find himself pleasantly amongst friends and kindred spirits. Glancing into rooms as we walked down the narrow hallway, a sport I hadn’t engaged in like 25 years, literally in every third room was a kid hooked up to a really nice big flat screen TV and a headset and a mic playing the network version of Gears of War or something like that. I had to check in with my 15 year old to know exactly what they were doing. We almost left him here too.

Not that Nate’s a big gamer but he is a bit of nerd and it made me happy to see that every other person on his floor is a nerd as well. Those other guys? Must be moving into the Delta Sigma Phi house if it’s anything like it was when I was in school. I still equate those three Greek letters with “dick”.

Lambda Chi Alpha

On the other hand, I was pleased to see that my own alma matter fraternity was here, dear old Lamda Chi. I wouldn’t be the man I am today if it weren’t for the brotherhood and strong bonds I made as an undergrad there.. not. I suggested to the lad that he should check them out when he gets time.. Mrs S, sitting next to me in the car made the following statement. “No FUCKING WAY”, I pushed a bit. “NO FUCKING WAY. I don’t want him hanging out with a bunch of womanizing drunks like you did. NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENED AT THAT FRAT OF YOURS”.

Hmm, “I meet you there” was about all I could reply.

It’s a wonder I didn’t burst into flames the way she was looking at me. I think there was real anger in her heart.

So, today is more campus tours, meeting with instructors, parents learning about how to be the parents of college kids, Mrs S is so excited she’s beside herself I’m thinking I want do some caching up here instead. We’ll see. The younger kids are going to Michigan Tech Sibling Camp where Lolo will get to do Jr High science experiments in the lab and learn about biology in a 6th grade way. Eric, who’s been bitching about going for 4 weeks is in for a treat, if he’d just shut the F up and do it. They’re going to the Geology Dept (Nate’s major BTW) and will be descending into a mine to see demonstrations of how copper was mined. Then they’ll spend the afternoon in the Physics lab making kinetic racers for a competition in the afternoon. Shit, he can take my place at the two hours I get to spend learning how to “Partner for Success- Parents role in College Experience”. or talking about the book “Lay that Trumpet In Our Hands”. We were supposed to all; Cheryl, Nate and I, read it so we could have a discussion about it today. Mrs S snapped at me yesterday “you never read that book dear.. how’ya gonna talk about it in our thing today, it’s like you don’t even care”. “Dear”, was my response “I spent 4 years of my college career sounding intelligent about books I never read, I’m sure it’s just like riding a bike.”

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August 22, 2009 · 5:26 am

College Move-in day

Today is move into the dorms day. After a rough night in the hotel.. Really, once experience of child-rearing that I’m certainly not going to miss is cramming a family of five into a hotel room. S-U-C-K-S. For one thing the air in the typical hotel room will support 2 adults for 8 hours. When you cram in a family like ours about 2 am the oxygen you’re breathing has already been in at least three other peoples lungs. The windows are dripping with condensation and daddy gets grumpy. Not to mention the constant battle of the sexs we enjoy. “TOO HOT” “TOO COLD” “TOO HOT” TOO COLD” uhh. I remember enjoying all this when we were travelling the small towns of Minnesota during the lads hockey days.

Our hotel is nice. We’re in the Ashtray Sweet. I don’t even remember the dude asking me if I wanted a smoking room or not, but I got a one, and it’s bringing back memories of my boys room from my highschool days. And once the kids had all filed through the john that cherished memory was completed after they trashed the place.

Mrs S spent part of last night handing out shower allotments. She was assigning times for us to be able to take our showers, ostensibly because we can’t all compete for it when we’re in a big hurry to get out of the room at 8:30 the following morning. Because I chose to engage with my family my putting on headphones and watching episodes of the office on my laptop, (in my defense they were watching Mean Girls with post mega-boob job Lindsay Lohan, who probably didn’t have to study much to learn the roll) I missed the shower allotment and got the evening shift. “Dad you gotta take your shower tonight ‘cause Mom blah blah blah” Really? I’ll take mine in the morning, thanks anyway. “well I just don’t want you be scrambling when you get up…” We’ve been married 24 f’n years. You’d think in that time, she would have noticed that I haven’t slept past about 6:00 in the last 15 of those. I also noticed that you haven’t gotten up before that time in that time. And, as part of the transformation to old guy, or maybe older guy, these days it’s more likely that I’m getting up at 4:30 or 5:00. Blows but it is what it is.

As predicted- 6:02 I woke up. We crossed a time zone on the way over here so 5:02 was about right on schedule.

This hotel is absolutely packed to the gills with parents and kids getting ready to start school this week. This being a full service hotel, they must have known that we’re all going to the same place this morning so they were nice enough to set off the fire alarm at 6:30. That took care of my family.

One interesting observation.. yet another difference between boys and girls. We got all of Nate’s shit into one suitcase plus his skis, skateboard and bike, oh and the fridge. But, we’re all in one car. The mighty Durango. In the parking lot of this hotel there are no less than 10 cars with attached trailers. The common denominator.. everyone of those cars that I can tell, has a daughter in it. Once dude has two daughters, twins it looks like. I kid you not he’s got a 16 foot heavyduty loaded to the top. Must not be moving into the dorm.

The plan for today, we go to orientation, or as they say in prison, intake, and then move into the dorm. We then will have 8 short hours to kill in Houghton before we have something to do. I’m sure I’ll be able to squeeze in another posting. Stay tuned.

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March 20, 2009 · 11:02 pm

TGIF

The end of one long-assed week, and I’m quite glad we’re finally to Friday. I’m a bit spent actually, and as evidenced by the lack of content in this very space, you can plainly tell Daddy’s been a bit busy.. Here’s some highlights and thoughts for the past week from your dear Sank.

Crabby Corgi strikes again- This F’n dog of mine never ceases to amaze me and fill my heart with wonder. This weeks great feat; Mr Giggs consumed, in one sitting apparently, an entire cantaloupe. We’re talking every part of the melon; rind, seeds, flesh EVERYTHING. I live in a house where it’s usually prudent to worry when things are quiet. Like, really quiet. And so I found it one night this week… no noise which means.. somth’n up! Going upstairs to the kitchen I managed to catch the little beast as the last of the rind went down. He looked at me and knew that I was a fix’n ta kick his half-a-dog-tall-two-dogs-long ass across the room.. Bee-lined it for the door and promptly went out side.

I’m sure there’s a cantaloupe seed encrusted lawn sausage waiting for me out there somewhere. That’s just gross.

Michigan Tech- The kid got a call from Michigan Tech this week. A “Jennifer” from Tech called to see if you had any questions? Jennifer? From Michigan Tech? There’s no “Jennifer’s” at Michigan Tech.. there aren’t any females at Michigan Tech, especially cutsie names like that. Michigan Tech is 80% male. AND the women I saw there.. lets just say if there is a Jenny there, she’s got herself a LOT of options.

AWS- We’re living with some Angry Wife Syndrome at the Sank house these days. Been that way for about 2 weeks. Being the sensitive loving can we all get along sort of dude that I am I had to finally ask.. “Is something wrong, Dear”.. You bet there is. She’s feeling stressed about the Senior Party coming up, she’s heading up the food committee.  Ohh I’m sorry to hear that your feeling stressed. OK, this is 25 years of marriage. Be concerned, be empathetic, but don’t overly engage or G-d forbid your going to find YOUR SELF being volunteered to help out. Which would suck. So the Mrs admits she’s uptight about this thing. And lacrosse where she’s the booster club chairwoman thingie or what ever, another deal I don’t want anything to do with.

So, she tells me, she’s stressed and this is making her crabby. She then tells me she’s planning on being crabby until after the party. After the party, which is in June. June ain’t exactly around the corner if you know what I mean. Being a man, I had to sort  start thinking… does this mean I’m cut off until.. She answered “you know dude,. this means I might not be in the right frame of mind for your plans.. unless of course you wanted to help out by working on the food committee. That could change my mind about, you know.. I could see you in a more positive and loving light and your chances would improve..  Hmmm, work for the boss for three months? Work at a party from midnight to 6am?

“I gotta a birthday in July, We’ll talk then..” in the mean time, where’s that old Katarina Witt Playboy I  collected years ago.

This is a great learning opportunity for you younger guys who feel like you’re under wifely control. Sometime in your 40’s, for the first time in your life you say the Magic Marriage Power Word. “NO”. You turn down sex for the for the first time in your life and just like that.. the shackles fall off, the Mrs Control function fails and boom.. you’re your own guy. Here’s what doesn’t work however.. don’t go for the “Oh yeah, “Well I’m going to cut you off”. that’s a stalemate you will not win. You’re not genetically equipped to win. The Mrs can cut the husband off indefinitely.

If a guy wakes up pissed off in the morning and tells his wife “Oh yeah, well let me tell you lady I’m not gonna do it with you for.. until… is that Victoria’s Secret? um… what were we talking about?”

 CARS- Because cars talk to each other in the garage, my Durango told my Toyota “the fat guy spent 1700 bucks on me this week.. that was fun, your turn now” Mrs S had concern that her car was driving rough.. turns out needed 4 new tires according to the Toyota guy. How much are 4 tires at the Dealership? ‘” Only $700.00, and I have a coupon you can use that takes $50.00 off” My repsonse “Um,, no.. she’ll be down there this afternoon to pick up the car and we’ll get tires elsewhere. “ “Sir, I don’t think you’re going do any better, and I think you want a Toyota service tech to do this..” Not going to do better? Is Wal-Mart outta business? “You would compromise saftey for a couple bucks?” Yeah turns out it was $550 bucks and for that matter, I’d sacrifice a lot more than my safety.  

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