Tag Archives: Life

February 13, 2012 · 9:52 pm

Whitney Houston Dead.. “Hmmmm”.

Saturday night, while sitting in a pizza place with a large group of friends, word came around the table that Whitney Houston had been found dead in a hotel room in Los Angeles. Another one of those  “do you remember were you were when you heard the news” sort of experiences. I still remember, quite distinctly, sitting on my parents couch watching the old black and white TV when news came across that Elvis was dead.

Now a days of course no one hears a rumor or a report with that sort of public cache without instantly reaching for the smartphone, the electronic tether actually becoming useful for once. And we all did it, looking down at the phones.. as if something important had happened.

Well, my reaction on hearing the news was a decisive; “hmmm”.

Yup, not shock, not surprise, nothing, just a non-committal “hmmm”.  Of course me, being me, after thinking about for a minute or two I remembered that Whitney has been in my little Dead Pool with my cousin for years, her lifestyle put here there. I realized that I had finally hit a long shot and with the death of Joe Paterno earlier this year, I’m a lock for the round of beers next January. In a related note, anyone check in on Zsa Zsa lately?

Ok, so obviously my second reaction, after “hmmm” was humor. I gotta be me after all.

Frankly I happen to believe that Whitney Houston “died” about 20 years ago. Right around the time she hooked up with Bobby Brown and made the choice to throw her life away on drugs, smokes, drinking and enter into an unsustainable lifestyle. It was at that point, to be honest, that I stopped caring about Whitney, and since she never made another album, I stopped listening too. “Live or die” as they say, “I get paid either way. “

I’m not one to suffer the deaths of troubled celebrities like Whitney Houston. Sad? Kinda, more of a “hmmmm”.

Now, I wasn’t angry about it like I was when Michael Jackson died. It wasn’t Michael’s death pissed me off, another one of those moments where I remember exactly where I was when I heard. I was sitting down to dinner at home when the news broke, coverage of an ambulance leaving his Brentwood home.  I remember the first words out of my mouth on that occasion; “good riddance”. He was a bad guy, I had no sympathy or even the least bit of a moist eye for that one.

What really got my goat about the Jackson’s death however, was the worldwide reaction, like some angel from heaven came down touched our lives and then left us, distraught but fulfilled that we had the opportunity to know him and his art. That scene at the Staples Center with celebs and his “kids” was particularly disturbing, had I been King of the World or Mayor of LA.. odds of either one being about the same, I wouldn’t have let them use the facility for that event. Disgrace to celebrate that guys life.

Disgusting to me was the fact because we liked Michaels beats, the world loved his music, we, and I’m collectively saying all of us, we were willing to overlook Jackson’s predatory behavior toward pre-pubescent boys and choose to only focus on his art. We dismissed his errant behavior because he was “odd”. We even attacked those who were trying to bring this molester to justice.

To this day, I think of him and refer to him as America’s Favorite Child Molester. I find it especially ironic that we were willing to (and rightfully so) throw down righteous condemnation down on Joe Paterno for his failure to protect children from Jerry Sandusky. Joe has never been accused of touching a kid.. I’m not excusing him, I’m just pointing out that in Jackson we have a guy with a history of molestation, a man who build an estate designed to attract victims to his bedroom where he could take advantage of his fame and his wealth victimize kids. Paterno loses everything, Sandusky will go to jail for a long time.. and Michael.. he was preparing for yet another world tour where throngs of people would have paid top dollar to watch him. It’s just not right.

Michael gets a star studded tribute, JoePa gets fired and dies in disgrace.

*sigh*…

Lets stop discounting the lives of celebrities just a second ok.. Wait a sec..not before I add Demi Moore to my Dead Pool now that a spot has opened up.. but if news of Demi’s demise came across the wire today, I’d have the same reaction “Hmmmm”.

“Hmmm” is kinda of big deal in my mind.

I don’t want to be remembered with a “hmmmm”. I’m starting to think that there’s no better measurement of a person’s life and the good which may have come from it than the reaction given when people who knew a person hear the news about their death.

A few years ago we had a neighbor pass away. He’d been in pretty good health, wasn’t all that old, about 65 or so, just a heavy smoker. He took ill, literally one day, and within about a month he was gone. He and I had a casual relationship, he would wave when I walked by, occasionally show up at neighbor events, he liked fishing and we’d talk about that.

As I got to know him a bit I started to learn more about him, and he I., I learned that he didn’t like Mexicans, that was pretty apparent about the third time we met. He didn’t like liberals, gun control or the idea that we’d elect Barak Obama president. He wasn’t big on minorities in our schools. He thought our town was going to hell because parents today don’t do anything to control their kids and kids.. well kids today have to sit in school with criminals and gangsters while their liberal school administrators lower the bar on education and discipline to make everyone feel good, even the those pesky “bad” ones.

Bottom line this fellow was a bitter miserable guy. Societal change left him angry and grasping for a world that existed in his mind, a world where white Christian gun owners made policy and everyone else shut up and thanked them being suffered the chance to live. And he assumed, since I’m white that I too  must have the same ideas on things that he did. That made me one of the good ones.

I hadn’t seen him in a while, I knew he’d been sick but didn’t realize how dire things had become. When Mrs S told me the neighborhood information hotline had reported that the fellow had passed my reaction; “hmmm”. His impact on others, negligible. His warmth, hidden behind his anger and his life, at least from the perspective of those of us who lived around him and interacted with him every day, he has been forgotten, except for the occasional “hmmmm”

Being remembered with a “hmmm” is choice. I hope I choose otherwise.

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October 2, 2011 · 9:04 pm

I thought I was done growing up

Joey, from Wide White commented on this blog that he has recently realized “some of the people I admire most won’t be around forever.” Although I’ve never met Joey in person, I’m a fan of his blog, he writes well, and he shares a lot of himself in his writing. Joey and his wife suffered their own loss in their family this year and the blogs that he wrote during that time were especially touching and powerful.

His comment has stuck with me through the last weekend as I’ve reframed some of my thoughts about people who are influential or important to me in my life. I suppose at some level I do sort of expect that they will be around forever.

I believed, until recently that growing up was something that you more or less completed about the time you turned 18, or maybe 21, or possibly when you hit 30, 40 but 50? Beyond that? Turns out I was uninformed on the whole process of growing up, this may in fact, never end.

I’ve watched friends and family, in the 40’s, usually early 40’s, who when they go home to visit parents, sort of revert back in the people they were when they were still living at home. One of the milestones of life in my opinion, is when you being the long process of changing your relationships with your friends from kid, to partner, to mentor to parent, when you become your parents parent.

My Father In Law and I talked about this a few times when his own parents were getting up into their 80’s. It came up when his father had purchased a car at one point. He had called his son, my father in law, to tell him that it would be the last car that he ever purchased. Not because of his mortality, that he didn’t think he’d live long enough to buy another car, no it was because he had lost is confidence in the transaction.

At 80 something years old, the former grain elevator owner and grain trader was no longer confident that he’d held up his end of the negotiations. He’d found the transaction, one that he’d preformed many times before, confusing and he was really concerned that he’d been sort of taken by the salesman. It was in that epiphany that he decided to start relying on this his children to start managing his affairs.

And so the parent became the child and visa versa.

I’ve now discovered, thanks in part to Joey who articulated what I had been toying with but was unable relay; there’s another milestone in development that occurs when you come face to face with mortality, be it your own or that of someone you care about or respect. It takes a certain maturity to understand the frailty of relationships and the importance of making the best from the time you have.

My Father In Law had an immense presence in our family, and I’m talking immediate family for this. A presence that transcended physical proximity, for the last 15 years we’ve lived 1500 miles away from the in-laws, but because of the sort of person he was for my wife and I, as well as for his Grandkids, he was always as close a thought or an inner voice helping us with decisions, causing us to think about how to approach things or acting in ways that we hoped he would approve, or  maybe it was just in ways that we thought he wouldn’t disapprove off. Even when he was diagnosed with lymphoma years ago, it never really set in that at some point he wouldn’t be here, I don’t think I was “mature” enough at that time to consider it. Now that that reality has occurred, I’m taking a great deal of comfort in the idea he’ll will still be with us, and it is because of that influence that he has had on us, that his influence that will endure.  There is, after all,  a part of me today that he’s responsible for, and that part will continue.

So all these heady ramblings and what not about this new milestone I’m passing if you will, have given me great pause to stop and think. How exactly will I be remembered, what part of other peoples lives, what part of my kids lives have I impacted or am I impacting now, and is it for the good?

A few years ago a fellow down the street from us passed away. I didn’t really know him all that well, he sort of kept to himself but we did have a few interactions over the years. He was a big fisherman and he liked to chat with me about that. He was also very interested in how the city was doing things, I should say opinionated, interested sounds a bit nice. Really though, from my perspective, if I was feeling nice I would describe this person as a little curt. Truth is he was a bitter guy who in his speech and actions came across as an asshole, but in the way that he was “our” asshole, so we cut him slack. He was diagnosed with lung cancer one summer, and within about 5 weeks, he was gone. As the neighbors gathered and communicated to each other the news of this fellows passing, almost the universally the conversation when something like; “Did you hear Jim died?” and the most popular response, a very chilling “Hmm”.

Then and there I realized that when I go, I’d really hate for the commentary from people who knew me on hearing of my passing to be the same response they give when they hear their team lost game or that a package they were looking for was going to be late.

That would indicate that I haven’t done enough to nurture, influence and impact those around me, and I’m thinking that realization, is yet another milestone passed on this big life thing. Now if I can just figure out how to make work.

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May 4, 2011 · 8:11 pm

Change, Gender Wars and Common Sense

The old sands are shifting under my feet.

Again.

The oldest kid is now home from school. Please note that the places where he dropped all his shit when he walked in the door from college on Sunday, are still covered by the same piles of shit now that it’s Wednesday. Over/under on my private odds board is 16 days before they’ll get picked up.

If we were not having a Bat Mitzvah in the family in 5 weeks, that number would go up to 96 days, or one day before he leaves for college again, but since Mrs S’s family will arrive here, one way or the other, in just a few short weeks, I have faith it will get picked up.

Fools hope?

The garage is still packed with crap from the remodeling/water damage/put shit away for the winter activities. Funny how the first layer of stuff goes in so neat and organized. Makes a nice foundation for the rest of the crap that gets tossed on top.  I was picking through the stuff Sunday afternoon, trying to make heads or tails of it. Since college kid is home and since his job doesn’t start for a few weeks… seems that I could make him do it. That Audi of his doesn’t run on water. I pay for jobs, he’ll want to work for  me. Mrs S pays as well. She doesn’t pay as well as I do, but she does run the company store. When I suggest something for him to do the response is “quit trying to make him do your chores”, when she suggests something; “you shouldn’t be asking anything other than ‘how high’”.

So I poked around in the garage overcome by the idea that I was going to have to clean the garage. Mrs S came out to take out the garbage and saw me out there, “what am I doing out here you ask?” in my sad voice meant to invoke feelings of empathy and some guilt about the state of the garage, a state I had nothing to do with. She didn’t bite “Well Sank, if it bothers you so much then you just clean it yourself.” I turned up the empathy play; “I’m just trying to find a little space on the floor for the bucket I’m going to stand on when I hang myself out here.”

Hmmm.  “Well there’s some room right under the rafter over there, that should work pretty good. Let me think where the good rope is.” She does always know where stuff is.

I had an interesting observation from my side of the gender war.  I have realized the following key difference between men and women. Every argument/discussion/developmental opportunities review that I have with my beloved, is in fact a continuation of every other argument that I’ve ever had with that same woman. That’s ‘cause… she remembers stuff.

Women, it seems, never “clear their cache” when it comes to arguments. This is exactly the opposite of me, I never remember what we were talking about anyway so every discussion is kind of like a new adventure.

What I can remember however is where I filed my daughter’s speech, the one which summarizes her Torah portion, which I happen to know she wrote in November of last year. I know this because actually I wrote it.

Kind off.

Speaking of ghost writing, the three of you left reading this, remember that assignment on Saturday Night Live for her museum project?  You’ll all be happy to know that I got 99 on it. The family went out to dinner to celebrate our collective score. Mrs S did some of the art work, I wrote the paragraphs and the assignee, she explained what had to be done.

Over and over again. The assignment, not just the 7th grade.

Speaking of the Bat Mitzvah. Daughters Bat Mitzvah. This is our last Bar or Bat anything. It’s funny,  one day you’re fleeing out of a McDonalds Playground because your kid just left a streak of dookie down the slide after she just  packed a diaper at the top of it, and the next day she’s up on Bema reading from the Torah. I’m not sure where the time went, cliché I know. Hard to imagine that in two years we’ll have our first college graduation.

Note that next year we’ll have a high school graduation but I still resist all efforts to make that event into anything more than a hearty congratulations. High school- expected, now go do some real work.

I’m also good at providing Tech Support for the family. Got a call at work “Computer’s running really slow, can you take a cab home in the middle of the day and fix it.” This was from the Daughter. Apparently she couldn’t get to her daily Justin Bieber YouTube fix.

A situation BTW, that knocked the Deficit Story AND the death of Bin Laden off the front page in our house.

“Go axe your brothers”.

I got home. Mrs S is at the computer with a face that usually reserved for me. “this thing’s slower then hell. Can you fix it? If not get a new one.” Both my boys we’re up looking at it. All three of them staring down a computer as if their collective ESP would make something happen. I’ve been on a lot of tech support calls and I know how this stuff works.

“Turn it of off and then uh  turn it back on”

“Can’t, you’re (meaning me) logged in”

“Doesn’t matter” “yes it does” “No it doesn’t, Mom’s an admin” “can’t turn it off” “ya” “no” “ya” “no” “no” “ya”..  little trick I picked from thousands of hours of Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd.

Mrs S had a comment “Dude, we can’t turn it off, you never listen to us about this stuff, remember when the Commodore 64 wasn’t working and I asked you to… and then the Apple IIE and then the time with the blah blah blah”

I walked over, reached behind the computer, yanked out power cord, handed to my oldest. “there… it’s off.”

Went back up stairs. Later that night I asked “how’s the computer?”  “Oh.. working great. Thanks Dear”.

Then again, sometimes things NEVER change.

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December 8, 2009 · 5:41 am

Wint’as Com’n

Sank House got all caught up in the winter preparations last night. The news has been all a buzz about how much snow we’re going to get, starting this afternoon and into tomorrow night. While not epic, it’s about 8 inches or so.. nothing too bad, unless that is you’ve been suckered into believing that winter just somehow, wasn’t going to come this year. Which is sort of where I was.

We’re still not 100% back from our, shall we say, ter-lit issues in the downstairs bath. The carpet is installed, and looks great BTW. Matter of fact, I have to say that the whole house is looking fantastic. Mrs S gets the credit for matching colors and textures and all that stuff that I never care about UNLESS, it’s not done right and I notice some nagging thing.. Anyway, looks good enough that the other day I even took a moment to notice.

Looks nice…

Except, the downstairs bath which as of this moment is yet un-tiled. And that is a shame.

Projects.. what is about big projects that the first 90% gets done in no time what so ever, the last 10% over the course of the next several years. Since we don’t actually have the tile we’re putting in, (she’s putting in) in our possession, we’re in a bit of a wait mode. Since putting in said tile will require that I move the washer and dryer.. I’m not saying a damn thing about it, preferring to work on her schedule.

And, since we have everything ready to go on the tile all the equipment is sitting in our garage.. we don’t have room for two cars in that garage. And since we have three cars .. well, we got the driveway shuffle going. Which isn’t that big a deal until it snows, except for the neighbors who have to look at our mini-parking lot of course? I’m sympathetic to their plight. Kinda.  When the snow comes down, more cars in the parking lot becomes a significant pain in ass.

Also, I hadn’t actually started the snow blower this year. Probably something we’d like to do BEFORE it snows and beat the rush to the repair place the day off the snowfall. Being a Toro Snow Commander.. I really didn’t anticipate any problems, its’ a commander after all.

Looking over the garage disaster, basically shit everywhere thanks to a remodeling and a family who are not able to fully comprehend the use of things like shelves and hooks and all that good stuff, causing me to stroke out every time I’m in there.  (You know,  it always amazes me how difficult it is to be the only perfect person in a family, you’d think the others would be more interested in basking in my goodness) Anyway, the truck ain’t gonna fit, the Scion, which will fit. hell we might even be able to hoist it into the rafters with the little battery powered car that I thought we got rid of 4 years ago, but seems to still be in our possession. It’s bigger than the Scion too..

Anyway..

Mrs S wanted the mower moved. The rider mower likes to hibernate in the winter. REALLY DOESN’T LIKE Waking up. After a few tries I got it going and we were good there. three more feet of space on the left side of the garage. Moved the carpet that we’re throwing away and the carpet we’re keeping for some reason,. Move the table with all the shit on it, pulled out the snow blower, put the new fresh gas/oil mix, pulled the cord and…

The fucking machine didn’t want a commitment, it just wanted to be ‘friends’.

I’ve heard that before.

What I have now however, that I didn’t have in college when I used to hear the ‘Friends’ line like a few times a week.. is an electric starter. :)   Oh yeah.. Plug it in, prime some gas., push the button and.. cough.. spit…. turn… pop. and on she went. Not before belching out a cubic ton of carbon emissions in one fell swoop mind you.. but it’s either run the machine or have my end of the driveway dead from the ‘shoveling the snow cor0nary’ that guys my age like.. yeah.. I’m running the machine and, just maybe, if it puts out some more greenhouse gases I won’t even need the damn thing a few years from now and wouldn’t that be nice. Sorry New Orleans.. but you enjoyed alot of years nice weather down there while we were suffering up in the great white north.

So, we’re ready. All staged and set for the great snow tonight. 8 inches. Took a call from the College Kid in Houghton Michigan… “Dad I love it here.. it snows every day”. On Saturday they got 18 inches there, a moderate snow for them. 12 more today and two or three every day from now until the forecast calendar ends on the 18th. They’re on their way to their average of 250 inches. The least they’ve ever had in recorded history.. 185 inches.. the most.. lets say just shy of 30 feet of snow.

I wonder what kind of Snow Commander they have?

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February 17, 2009 · 8:37 pm

Unaccounted and Unprecedented

Last week I was out 4 of 5 nights. Not all that unusual for me. Several Mason’s events and a few other things going. Since that was about the third straight week of that, Mrs S was starting to get a bit uptight. Can’t blame her.
So this week I’ve canceled everything and am spending every night at home. All 7 of them. What do I get for my time?
Nuth’n good. What was supposed to be a nice deposit into the Banco De’Honey has turned into an analysis of my cooking and spending habits. Togetherness being a bit overrated.

Mrs S does the bills. Pays them all.. I have no idea what we pay for anything. I just live here. Sort of. Mrs S pays the bills and runs the household stuff. That’s her role.
When there’s issues, I think thats when my role comes in. This winter we’re having issues with our snow plowing service at the lake. We’ve been overcharged for some services. Really overcharged according to Mrs S, who pays and tracks snowfalls and whatnot.. (Whatnot is a new word for me to overuse, taking the lead from my kid)
She’s thinking that we were almost double paid based on the limited snow we’ve had. SO, she informed me that I had to call the place and negotiate a new price. This is after the fact. Add on that I asked them to blow the grass a bit to park during the ice fishing-a-palooza. Needless to say I called, talked man to man and sided with the guy. Tried to pay with a credit card, and read a number wrong. They called her for the right number, she realized that I was paying the amount and… a nice phone lashing at work.
Apparently it was my fault that I didn’t listen to her.. a common theme,. but to be honest when she starts telling me thing with more than three lines the words start running together and I start thinking about Tator Tots. It’s a curse. Man curse.
Then I got to come home an talk more. Any more talking talking and I’ll have to extract an icepick from my eye.

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January 21, 2009 · 7:27 am

Note to the Moose, and other interested parties

I’m a bit over social networked at the moment. Facebook, Twitter, Blog, Flicker, Family phone calls…
Cyberpal Durham Moose has correctly called out a few times that I’m not posting on Flicker as religiously as I once did. Ture enough. I’m also not playing the guitar these days like I once did, and I’m more upset about that.
Frankly I haven’t had the time or the motivation to go out and take any good photos in a while. That, and I wasn’t too happy wiht the stuff I was trying to be good at.. but not wanting to surrender I’ll do’er all over again.
Look for and Ice Fishing set this weekend when we venture out for the annual (re-launched after a couple years off) No Wimps Ice Fishing and Cheap Boozefest.
In the mean time, this very site is the spot for your dose of the Sank-Mundane.

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July 30, 2008 · 9:10 pm

Quiet Times

It’s been mighty quiet around the Casa this week. With both of the boys up in the Boundary Waters, it’s just Mrs S, Lolo and I. A preview of things to come if you will. I could almost get used to the peace and quiet. It’s almost nice around here. We really don’t have a ton of things going around here this week to write home about, or to write to the blog about.

The Twins have managed to win the first couple games from the White Sox… Tonight doesn’t look good, but when your starting pitcher is 107 years old.. well you aren’t going to win every game. Still, if they can win tomorrow that’s going to be three out of four from the division leaders.

I saw, with a bit of sadness, that the company where I had the first “real” job in my career, back in California, has filed for Chapter 11. 59 years, 49 good ones, and now it looks like they’re going to be another victim of the economic downturn. Although, in there case it’s not that they’ve been struggling for years, the crappy economy in California has done them in. To bad, I kind of liked them even though they vacated Minnesota years ago. Merv Morris, the 88 year old founder of the company lived long enough to see his company go from one store and a $1500 day to their peak at over 300 hundred stores in the early 90’s.

Speaking of California, I’m getting more and more disgusted with the national media. Since when does a 5.6 quake merit headlines across the country? The worst headlines were the ones that claimed that this was preview of “the big one”. Must be a slow news day.

Friday Mrs S heads up to Ely Minnesota to pick up the boys on Saturday. Once she has possession of the lads, she’s ripping down to Apple Valley, a 5 hour drive, where they guys will get a 10 minute stop to crap and brush their teeth, it’s back in the car for the next leg of the trip, 9 hours down to St. Louis.

Last night I had a chance to go to a jam session. I hadn’t been out in public playing for about 6 months. Eric, over at Eric Has Issues suggested that I get out and play the guitar and frankly, it was just what the doctor ordered. Next weekend is the annual Minnesota Old Time Music and Bluegrass Association summer festival. Three full days of jamming, I’m thinking about going. Sounds like a blast. Sort of a cross between Woodstock and Renascence Festival.

Better that than the Burning Man deal I got invited too with a few friends at work. I’m not ready to see my workmates naked. Plus, driving out Nevada seems like a long way to go to be exposed to skin cancer and drink my own urine for a week.

Other than that, not a hell o’va lot goin’ on round here.

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May 15, 2008 · 12:12 pm

Updates, and lists.. and other thoughts

Early in my blogging career I used to post a lot of lists. Lists of music I was listening too, lists of restaurants, coffee shops, movies, books what ever caught my fancy. I posted all these lists because writing about a list is much easier than writing about anything substantive. Plus all my blogging friends were writing them, so it seemed the thing to do. I also used to get a lot of meme’s in the dark ages. Now, it’s been a year or more since someone last “tagged” me with some silly questionnaire about some aspect of my personal life.. Now I’m wondering, A) have those question things become passe in blogland? B) Has this space actually grown past it? BTW, I’m not asking for one, just wondering.

I will get back to a few lists as I do like reporting and reviewing on items around here.

Suburban Hell

People around take some serious offense when people like me suggest that the ‘burbs, and especially the ‘burb of Apple Valley aren’t the greatest place on the planet to live. Monday night I found myself with a very rare free night and decided to deliver on my commitment to walk 4X per week.

FYI- I’m on a roll here to lose about 50lbs.. aggressive goal. Eating way different now and a few of the lbs are falling off. I’ve decided that 1) Fat and ugly is now way to go through life, I can fix one and 2) I’m determined NOT to join the rest of my family among the ranks of America’s Diabetic Majority. I got a warning shot from my physician that I’m on track for that unless I make some serious changes ’nuff said

My walk.. I’m finding that going for an evening walk is hard to get motivated for. It’s makes it even more apparent how poorly designed the suburbs are, I just can’t get excited about walking around bunch of tract homes and yards. It sucks. And if you wanted to walk to the store, forget it. you have to cross 6 lanes of traffic twice and walk across long dusty parking lots. It’s a chore.

So Monday I decided to grab the daughter and hop in the Spec and drive up to Minneapolis and walk around Lake Nokomis. 2.7 miles, 30 minutes or so, and it wasn’t even work. After the lake we walked over the Caribou for a coffee and then down to Pumphouse creamery for the girl to get some ice cream. According to my GPS an elapsed walk of about 5 miles. And, it was painless miles, I loved it. That’s something we really miss in Apple Valley.

Just Say No

The Jock came home with some propaganda about abstinence as choice. Wasted on a kid who’s never even talked to a girl, as far as I know. But still cracks me up that the government is wasting money on this program. “Choose abstinence” is the message. My line of the day, from a buddy at work, “I didn’t choose abstinence, abstinence chose me”… HA.. that’s the problem. Me and our state Governor apparently.

BTW, here’s a great way to invite abstinence into your life guys. When looking over the families expenditures over a given month… BTW we’ve been on an austerity plan since Jan 1. New year resolution was to eliminate frivolous spending and live on a budget. Here we are mid May and we’re still on track. The bad side effect, I’ve become a bit of cheap skate. Anyway, if you’re tired of your wifes affections and attention and need a break I suggest the following. Lookover the budget and be shocked at an expenditure for $100.00 for a haircut. Make a comment. When told it included coloring suggest that the color of austerity, which was her idea BTW, is gray, and follow up with a suggestion that “need” and “want” are confused in your wifes head.

That’s how I learned that the same applies to more the more delicate of interpersonal relations, or as I like to say, we’re going from austerity to abstinence, and back hopefully one day, back again.

What’s up with:

- every one BUT me being able to fix MY glasses. I have a pair of fancy pants no frame glasses. The lens has popped out twice now revealing a soft plastic thingie, which looks like a piece plastic produce bag that keeps the lens in. For the life of me, I can’t figure to get the lens back in there. Mrs S, Nate, Eric and the next door neighbor however can do it with no problem. Weird.

- My daughter has about a 50% hearing loss in one of ears, something less in the other. It’s related to a high frequency of ear infections and 20 or so sets of ear tubes. She’s supposed to tell us when she’s having trouble hearing so Mrs S can take her in for a check. Sunday morning.. I suggested that I’ve been noticing that she’s back to saying “huh” all the time and something’s up. Mrs S agree. I called her into our room where we chatting. “Lolo, hows the ears?”, “Fine”, “no hearing problems?” “No Dad I’m fine” “Do you need to see Dr. Conally?” “No Dad”

Ok… I chatted with Mrs S for a bit and then turned back to her “I want you to be able to hear”. She ran off downstairs. Mrs S suggested that she’s probably OK and I should leave her alone. She promptly returned with beer in her hand for me.

Her appointment is next Monday.

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April 27, 2008 · 9:59 am

Sunday Morning Shorts

Sunday Morning Coming Down
Sunday morning, being better than Saturday morning this weekend in Minnesota. Saturday… I can’t even being to bitch about. Last week we were in the 70′s three of the 5 days of the work week. Saturday we woke up to the beauty of freshly fallen snow on April 27… The Jock has a lacrosse pancake breakfast on Saturday morning. How fun, in late spring, to walk across the parking lot of the Applebee’s in driving snow and high winds.

Speaking of which.. Applebees? Going in there I have to wonder if the country is worth saving to be honest. No wonder we’re all fat and up to our asses in bad financial choices.. if being a moron were a disease.. Applebees is where it’s victims congregate. I had to go there Friday night to scout the place with Mrs S, the hostess of the first and last annual lacrosse pancake breakfast. There were tons of people waiting in LINE to get into Applebee on a Friday night. Sad sad sad.

But, we love it here…

This years great weather story made even better this morning with an article in the paper about next weeks Fishing Opener in Wisconsin. The fishing opener is a big deal in these parts. In WI it’s the first Saturday in May, in MN, the following weekend, (almost always corresponding with Mothers Day weekend for some damn reason) Anyway, for the first time in a LOOOOONG time, this years opener will be hampered on northern lakes (Like ours) by the 12 inches of ice still covering most lakes. I called up to our place this morning and learned that our lake is still frozen.. but there open water on the edges..
Ice fishing in May… I’m thinking no one will be swimming Memorial Day.

When do they get usefull?

This fine morning dawned sunny, but with no snow. Good. After rousting the girl from her slumber and getting her dressed and ready for Sunday school, I started the coffee intake procedure. Looking at Red I made an offer. “Dude, I’ll give you $10.00 to drive your sister to Sunday school this morning.” “Dad, I’m 14″ “I’ll write you a note”, “I’m only good at Wii driving Dad..”

OK go wake you brother.. Mrs S looked at me over the paper in that way of women that says “You’re an idiot”. He’s fun to be around when you get him up early. He’s especially fun to be around when you assign him a chore right when he gets up.. Oh well, ’tis a thought.

It being the last day of the Passover however, it occurred to me that I should check the Temple website to see if they’re having Sunday school. I was as happy as kid on a snow day to see those magic words… No Religious School- April 27. Lolo was even happier.

Whose kids are these?

Red, this morning, comes down stairs, index finger several mm into his nostril, rolls out at specimen and without thinking wipes it on the banister while his mother, sister and I are watching. The response was immediate. I don’t think he even knew what he was doing being half asleep.. he woke up quickly when he came down… Laura was first with a high pitched scream.. followed by DAD DID YOU SEE WHAT ERIC JUST DID? HE WIPED HIS BOOGER ON…” Mrs S was right behind with an enthusiastic OMG YOU DISGUSTING FREAK.. followed by me with  “WHoa… Technical foul… ” I insisted that he go get the lysol and start disinfecting the entire staircase. While he was wiping it down I asked him “WHat the hell are you thinking” every 30 seconds to make sure my point got across. He didn’t have an answer, finished the job, accused his Sister of being a “rat” and went back to bed. I gave him the ultimate punishment, made him come down stairs and sit with his family.

The girl.. the girl the girl….. quiet in the house, when all the kids are home, typically is indicative of a problem. It got pretty quiet on the house..  Our home has an open floor plan. The kitchen that has walls which do not reach the ceiling. There’s open space up there. Mrs S. has put some silk plants, baskets etc up there. So imagine my surprise to come downstairs this morning and find my daughter up there too. Trying to be quiet hoping I wouldn’t see her.. WTF.. She gets up there apparently, by shimming up the door jam and then using her feet to push off the white wall.. Her intuition told her that “Dad may not like this” which is why she was being so quiet. No shit.

The rest of the morning was spent hitting each other with objects and fighting over who had to feed the dog and uses all the hot water in the house… We have a soon-to-be 17 year old son who pinches his sister just to make her scream, a 14 year old with serious hygene problems and a 10 year old monkey girl… Status Quo on the ranch.

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March 28, 2008 · 2:35 pm

Patience

I ran errands today.

Lots of errands, made 6 different stops around town.

I had my Troubled Middle Child and our Extroverted Daughter with me… Is this what hell is like? 6 times, once every stop, I was treated in inane argument about who gets to sit in the front seat and a judicial ruling of the term “fair”. At Ikea we bought a wool duster. We got to fight about who got to hold the wool duster. The person who got to hold the thing would then proceed to whack the other with it, when I wasn’t looking. Starting , yet a new fight. Is that nice.

“PUT THE F’ING THING IN THE BASKET AND LEAVE IT THERE”

Girl child- Jeez Dad you don’t have to swear.

Last night I had them with me at my Baseball League Draft. We were at the Sports Page in Bloomington. We were there sort of late for them.. I was drafting a team, go find something to do kids..
“Dad” the girl asked.. “Is this a BAR?”, What the hell.. “Yes it’s a bar dear…” Back to the draft.. I hear “Yeah, we’re in the bar…” Turning around I see the little narc on the phone. Mom has called brother and now they’re telling her that for tonights entertainment, Daddy brought us to a bar. Isn’t that nice.

Brings me back to today. At the grocery store today.. Gimmie, I want, I hate, He doesn’t….

On we went. A couple good arguments broke out about pusing the cart. I WANNA , NOT FAIR.. I WANT… Mistakenly I let the boy push. 1 Nano second later he had pushed the cart in way that boxed the sister into the bread display. That was Ok because she had spent her time at the store collecting coupons and recipes. She had quite a handful. I wonder if anyone over 11 collects those things from the aisle dispenser.

Coming home I put the grocery’s away. AND listened to the kids argue about who got to dust with the new duster.

It’s a long day.

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