We’re here in Auburn Alabama doing the campus tour thing for the girl. She would be our second kid to attend Auburn should this work out. 4 more years of fall trips down here for football and hanging out. We stay in Columbus when we’re here. We stay with Mrs S’s Dad’s cousins.. actually, I’m not quite clear on the familial deets. But where the actual lines of relation are blurry to me, the sense of family is not. Which is a good thing.
We did the campus tour today. Frankly I’ve done the tour on my own about 6 times just walking around. Never the less i still managed to learn a few things about the campus. For example, undergraduates are not touch the seal in the ground of in front of Langdon Hall lest a curse will manifest on them that they will not graduate on time. The way to break curse is to swim in the fountain on the a leap year.. blah blah blah. Not sure exactly what the deal was, but apparently if you buy a class ring there’s a lovely ring ceremony where the curse if symbolically broken and some other stuff happens..
Ok so paying attention isn’t my strongest suite. However since the cost of ring is about a “yard” in gambling parlance, I’m going to suggest a nice commemorative coffee cup and skipping the ceremony.
Langdon Hall I learned is also where Alabama lawmakers debated succession back in the day. Talk about winning the argument but losing the battle.
I skipped the dorm tour. Told Mrs S I had some work to do as the group headed over the residence halls. I figure schlepping two kids worth of shit in and out of dorms the last few years entitles me to a pass. Moving the boys is where I learned that nothing has changed in the student warehousing business in 30 years. Interestingly enough the guides did talk about the new posh South Donahue Hall. That dorm is quite different. Two students share a suite. Each kid has their own bedroom with their own private bath, queen size bed, and hold on now, washer and dryer. The share a common area with a plasma TV, furniture, small kitchen with full size refrigerator, sink and granite countertops. The guide explained that these were Auburn’s most expensive housing option. She left out most of the residents there don’t actually pay for housing, they’re on athletic scholarships. And while I would like to question our countries priorities when it comes to collegiate athletes, I did pay $150 a seat to go to the game on Saturday, making me, part of the problem.
Our kids dorm, and I assume the girl will live where the boy did, feature shared bedrooms, two per room, a bathroom shared with 2 more kids, no kitchen, and a laundry shared with the entire dorm. Amd stcked with machines that require quarters.
What they do have are toilets that have the strongest flush mechanism I’ve ever experienced. My oldest son, the geologist, after using the can came out and promptly suggestted that “that toilet will open up a sinkhole outside”. He a scienist, he would know. Being practical myself, and a survivor of four years in dorms I suggested that these things have to be able to take down a beer can, or a bag of pot that’s still in the bag in case you don’t have time to empty it as your RA is coming through the door with an axe.
All speculation on my part. All speculation.
The tour guide referred to the many healthy eating options on campus, I’ve only heard of Chic-Fil-A. I think my son eats there every day. But there are some other options. What there isn’t is a cafeteria. The closest thing is the eating area in the afore mentioned Athletics dorm where you can get steaks, made to order omelets for breakfast.. It’s more expensive but again, most kids eating there don’t pay.
The rest of the tour was cool, but my ADD kicked in and I found myself wondering about what the purple flowers were in the yard and if a Confederate Rose really does change colors during the day (it does).
So we’re done with college visit number 2 for this kid, 9 overall. I was my first and I was reminded why I haven’t been invited to these before, I’m snarky and I may have said ” helicoptering” to Mrs S when she was asking about career fairs for our kid who’s a Senior down here.
Matter of fact, I may not get asked back.