Flu Shots and Zombies- is there a connection?

Some good news for a change, vertigo has resolved itself. As of yesterday I’m no longer dizzy. Yeah.

I’m still hearing a loud ring, but that’s been going on for a long time.

This is good reinforcement for bad male behavior. If you ignore a symptom long enough it will go away. Besides, reading the news I wouldn’t go near a hospital, doctors office, clinic, urgent care, pharmacy or any other health care provider, at least not until this flu thing runs its course. Sounds bad out there. I work in a cube farm and lots of folks tend to come in sick. It might just be a matter of time, but if I can keep my hands away from my eyes go Howard Hughes on the door handles and such I might make it through.

I did get a flu shot. Hearing mixed reviews on that these days. My mother-in-law, a certified health guru who consumes information about health and well-being like I breathe air, surprised me when the questioned the wisdom of flu shots. Something about mercury in the vaccine and they don’t work.. In her mind it’s a big pharma issue. I’m confused now, made worse as I read that the flu shot isn’t all that effective this year. Well, first I hear that it is working, then it isn’t, then the head of the State Epidemiology department comes on the radio and assures us that reported cases of the flu shot not working are something else, followed up by a news story from Boston where the entire population of Beacon Hill was inoculated and are now lying dead in the parking lot of the local hospital. I saw outbreak I know where this is going, I also watch Walking Dead so I know where it’s is going after that. Now that I think about it, maybe the flu shot is the way they’re introducing the zombie virus into all of us. Maybe, it is one giant conspiracy. And once we become zombies we can spend more time in cube farms.. it’s all coming together.

Shameful thing is the government still denies the zombie apocalypse. What evah. Need I remind you that it was just this summer that a man had his face eaten off in Florida, it’s coming people.

Cube farm/plague factory aside, I’m feeling strangely confident that I can avoid the flu this year, despite expected flu shot failure. Although I probably just jinxed myself. But there is reason for my confidence. For one thing 2/3 of the germ carriers in our family are away at college. Should the flu hit the dorms at Auburn, we can read about it on Facebook and not be exposed. Same goes for Michigan Tech. I’m chalking that up to “good thing”.

I don’t have any close personal contact with anyone. No spit-swapping around here none of that good touch bad touch stuff. Aside from work I don’t really have any contact with people so I’m insulated that way. No foreign germs or introduced pathogens. No close personal contact can work in your favor sometimes. Howard Hughes would be proud.

Like him I also save my urine in jars in the basement, which has nothing to do with the flu but everything to do with my sanity. More in the foil cap department. What with the intrusive government monitoring and all that.

Just yesterday there was a black helicopter hovering over the neighborhood during day. Just sitting there monitoring our communications I think. I wasn’t there to see it, I was at work, but when I walked home from the bus stop you could totally tell it had been there. The leaves on the ground were different.  I mean they’re under snow at the moment but they’re different, we sensitive types can tell these things. Kinda of a gift.