I’m Going To Regret This

I know I’m going to regret this, writing late at night, Macbook perched on my needs as a lie in bed..

<<SOUND EFFECT OF RECORD NEEDLE BEING DRUG ACROSS A RECORD>>

“What d’you say, ‘mac book? Last time I read this space you talking about PC’s and how happy you were in the PC environment.. and Dude, you’re had to pin down.”

I know. It’s a problem. I’m probably on the spectrum somewhere, yeah, THAT spectrum. I’ve had some PC issues that reminded me of the downsides of PC’s vs. Mac’s.

- In the last month my video drivers have gone totally corrupt. To the point that I’ve now logged 3 hours with Microsoft Technical Support, my PC hooked into my LAN cable as they’ve put the “technical speculum” up it’s operating system to see what’s causing it to go Screen D’Azure about once a day. So far, after three hours of searching and log reading and all the other things Mike in San Antonio who I strongly suspect is actually Krishna in Bangalore, we’ve been able to find nothing other than, “dude” which he pronounces “dooood” very endearing. something is quite hose’ed up in your driver area.”

You know how many times the three macs in the house have had driver errors? Nada. Although only one of the mac’s can actually print with the current printer configuration, they say that can’t find the printer. I put the Damn thing ON TOP OF THE PRINTER and they still can’t find it. Which is reason to believe that computers are in fact all male. We can’t find shit we’re sitting on either.

Bigger question is who corrupted my drivers. Seriously, who got in there and led them astray to blue screen land? “cause I tell you what”, sure as a deuce wadn’t me. Been nigh on 29 years since I last corrupted anything, and I could argue it worked out as I married it, or her, or whatever, you get the gawd damn point.

- Key Stickiness. OK, corrupt drivers is one thing, but this keyboard thing.. what happens is every once in a while, not so often that I can show it anyone one, but often enough that it’s a pain, the CNTRL key or the ALT key sticks, you know with out warning. Sticks. Yeah, and the more important the thing I’m working on, the better chance it has to stick. I’ll be typing along and all of sudden I’m typing in characters that look like comic book curses OR I suddenly start executing the key strokes that start opening and closing stuff all at once and my screen goes crazy. The remedy is run your hand over the entire board trying to figure out which key is stuck and trying to unstick it while not losing my work. Don’t it suck to be me? Awful.

- Screen blemish. Nice way of saying scratches. I’m 4 months into this experience and my screen is scratched. The lady at the Microsoft store said it was because I wasn’t caring for the computer correctly. But the scratches are exactly the same shape as keyboard keys. That’s when I learned about the keyboard slim pad thing that goes between the keyboard and the screen to protect it. Handy. So handy I’ve never heard of it.

But I’m a man, I can change, If I want to, but not know.

- Resale. This probably chaps the ass more than anything. My 4 year old unibody Macbook with 4G ram and a thimble sized hard drive has more used market value than my high end i5 processor driven laptop. Lots more.. 50% more.

But it’s not all bad. Mrs S has been able to say “I told you so” every day for the last 6 weeks, which I find annoying at best, but it does put her in a fairly jolly mood otherwise. Which trumps everything, happy life get a happy wife.

As I was sitting around today in deep contemplation, thinking about doing something but somehow not quite being able to muster the energy to actually move my critical massedness fat assedness body to do it. Mrs S and Miss S are Cali this weekend. So it’s quiet around the Casa. Me’n the dog. hanging.

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